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    兩個人在一起最好的狀態

    時間:2018-04-15 13:19:26 來自:愛情感悟  閱:

    文/溫書先生

    電影《秒速五厘米》中有這樣一句臺詞:

    “人的一生會遇到約2920萬人,兩個人相愛的機率是0.000049,所以你不愛我,我不怪你。”

    茫茫人海中,兩個人相遇、相愛、相知,最后擁有美滿幸福的結局,這大概是每個人所期待向往的吧!可是世界這么大,我們遇到的人又何其的多,終究有些人錯過了這份概率。

    之前在知乎上看過一個帖子:你認為兩個人在一起最好的狀態是怎么樣的?

    有人說,是他打他的英雄聯盟,我窩在他旁邊拿著ipad看豆瓣,看知乎,然后淘寶,等他消滅了怪獸,一起去廚房煮個宵夜。不累人,不費神,不刻意,不用琢磨更無須糾結,樂得安于現狀;

    有人說,是有相似的健康習慣,朋友、家人對這段感情是支持的,兩人都在關系中成為了更好的自己,門當戶對的般配;

    有人說,是有聊不完的話題,彼此之間樂意分享,不管是開心還是難過都能敞開心扉告訴對方,相互信任,彼此牽掛。

    ......

    每個人的回答里都有他們自己的故事和對愛情的領悟。這個問題沒有唯一的答案,只是想讓我們在尋求答案的過程中認清彼此的心。

    1

    剛好的時間,遇見剛好的你

    當愛情萌芽的時候,往往是濃烈的表達,竭盡全力的告訴對方“我愛你”,希望得到對方的回應,然后一步一步的靠近,直到兩人一起墜入愛河。

    沈從文對張兆和說:“我行過許多地方的橋,看過許多次數的云,喝過許多種類的酒,卻只愛過一個正當最好年齡的人。”

    任何一位姑娘聽到這樣的告白,估計都會心動吧!沒有華麗的辭藻,也沒有夸耀的語句,卻讓人透過樸實的語句感受到最真摯的愛。

    錢鐘書第一次見到楊絳的時候說的第一句話是:“我沒有訂婚。”楊絳回答:“我也沒有男朋友。”這段一見鐘情的場景也成就了一段愛情佳話。

    當愛情還含苞待放的時候,不要退縮,不要隱藏,因為愛最需要的是表達,用言語,用肢體,用禮物,用你的笑容,用所有你能想到的方式去表達愛。

    后臺經常有粉絲問先生:“他從不主動找我,也不說愛我,他是不是真的不愛我?”

    先生的回答是:其實你心中早已有了答案,愛一個人是藏不住的,不愛一個人也是。一個連我愛你都吝嗇于說給你聽的人,愛上了一定很痛苦吧!

    如果你們在相愛的初期,請大聲說出“我愛你”。

    最好的狀態不過是初見你時滿心歡喜,一眼便刻在心里。

    2

    你的缺點,在我眼里也是閃光點

    在微博上看到過這樣一段對話:

    女孩問男孩:“我的缺點多不多?”

    男孩說:“像星星一樣多。”

    女孩又問:“那優點呢?”

    男孩說:“像太陽一樣少。”

    女孩微怒道:“那為什么會選我呢?”

    男孩寵溺地摸著女孩的頭說:“因為太陽一出來,星星就消失了。”

    因為相愛,才會變得寬容,才會接受對方的缺點,而不會常常看不慣對方一些細節的行為揪著不放去挑剔與指責。

    愛情不僅要欣賞彼此的優點,更要包容彼此的缺點。

    兩個人在一起之后,越走越近,看到的對方也是越來越真實的。從了解到理解,這個過程中往往會出現一些摩擦,這時需要用愛去接納。

    電影《志明與春嬌》中張志明特別喜歡玩干冰,每次把干冰丟到馬桶里面,看著干冰遇到水從馬桶里面冒出大量白霧緩緩升起,覺得特別神奇,每次都玩得很過癮,甚至去買哈根達斯吃的時候,也會多要一些干冰拿回家玩。

    志明帶女朋友去玩干冰,可是女朋友只是遠遠看著張志明在那里玩,她不肯伸手去抓那些白霧,因為她覺得很臟。

    可是當志明帶著春嬌去玩干冰,春嬌說:“哇!好勁啊!好似仙境”,兩個人都玩得樂此不疲。

    愛一個人,即使那個人做出了旁人覺得不能接受的奇怪舉動,你也能懂得他的那份特別。

    最好的狀態不過是縱使你缺點再多,我也用盡全力愛你。

    3

    乍見之歡,不如久處不厭

    有人說:愛情不過是四個階段,始于顏值,陷于才華,忠于人品,安于陪伴。

    我的父親和母親是八十年代自由戀愛結婚的,當時的父親和母親是鄰居,所以也就近水樓臺先得月了。

    父親總是開玩笑說,母親那時候總會故意挑著水桶從門前經過,他覺得這小姑娘真勤快,娶回家是好事,便開始追求母親。

    而母親的版本截然不同,母親說,覺得當時父親家里太窮,小伙子不好找媳婦兒,便發善心答應了父親的追求。

    雖然知道這是他們的互相調侃,我每次也會忍不住調侃一句:“你們那時候談對象真隨意。”父親母親便會相視一笑,回我一句:“把你放到那個時候,你也找不著對象。”

    兩個人在一起,并不一定要脾氣相像,而是即使完全不同,卻也能相互包容。

    兩個人在一起,并不一定要多同步,而是即使步調有所不同,其中一方也會停下來等一會兒。

    我慶幸擁有一個幸福的家庭,有一對乍見心歡,久處不厭的父母。

    婚姻中的柴米油鹽常常會磨掉愛情最初的心歡,但是仔細想想細水長流的溫馨有時候比轟轟烈烈的浪漫更讓人暖心。

    久了你就會知道,你需要的只是一個累了能給你端一杯水、病了能陪在你床頭的人。這世上所有的久處不厭,都是因為真愛。

    最好的狀態不過是開始相處不累,最后相處不厭。

    4

    兩個人在一起的狀態不會是一成不變的,在這些變化中找到你的最佳感受,那就是你想要的答案。

    和最愛的人相濡以沫,相伴余生,既溫柔了歲月,也驚艷了時光。

    只愿朝朝歲歲,平安喜樂。

    只愿一生一世一雙人,一悲一喜一浮生。

    如果這篇文章對您有幫助,請分享給身邊更多的朋友!

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